My Brain is a Browser with 87 tabs

My Brain is a Browser 

with 87 tabs open, 

one blurs into another

 like omens.

They all plead for my attention

 because they need me —

 like a little lighthouse shouting 

LOOK AT ME — 

and I do,

 and I don’t,

 because somehow they're all 

urgent and unfinished.

It’s the curse of a creative. 

Because when you do what you love 

you never work a day in your life. 

Or maybe

 every day becomes work.

Some say why, 

we say why not — 

but there has to be a limit.

 How many tabs can a mind contain

 before something crashes?

There’s one for the street food truck, 

one for the fine dining restaurant, 

another for the private chef service,

 and two more

 for wholesale granola 

and a salad bar.

But the list becomes a maze —

 too many turns, too many directions. 

It stops being a path 

and starts being a trap.

You don’t just lose the way out,

 you lose the way in. 

You forget where the centre is —

 what it was all meant to orbit.

The tabs all have big personalities. 

They talk over each other and argue,

 each with their own sense of self-importance

 and right to occupy my time.

But without all that noise,

 all those distractions — 

with space, time, air to breathe and… 

not think — 

maybe I’d remember 

why I opened the first tab.

Not to build an empire,

 not to monetise a passion, 

not to prove my worth.

But because I was curious. 

Because it made me feel something. 

Because I loved it.

And somewhere along the way, 

what once felt like play

 started dressing like productivity.

 Hobbies became hustles. 

Enjoyment needed justification.

Fun had to earn its place

 But maybe

 not everything I love 

needs to pay rent in my brain. 

Maybe one tab can stay open just because.

Maybe this poem’s

 a meta-tab —

 a browser window

closing itself.

🍍 Paired Dish: Pineapple & Sweetcorn Rice Bowl with Gochujang, Lime & Soy

Because when your brain has 87 tabs open, you need a meal that looks like your fridge had a meltdown… but somehow tastes like inner peace.

It’s fast, hot, sweet, spicy, slightly confused — and absolutely delicious.

(Recipe not included. My tabs are open, but my book isn’t.)